Red State

In an interview with Rotten Tomatoes (UK style), Kevin Smith has dropped some knowledge on his upcoming projects. To read the full story go here.

First up, Kevin Smith’s much rumored horror movie. The title of this movie, according to Kevin Smith, is Red State. In the interview, Kevin says that it is based on how some people can get over zealous about their religion/political point of view. Taking this to the extreme, these people will probably do some torture/murder type things (my speculation, but pretty safe to say because it is supposedly a horror movie). Could be pretty interesting, but you know my position on the horror genre.

Speaking of the genre, Kevin mentions a couple of times that Red State will not be a typical horror movie. He says that it is a horror movie in his eyes, but others will look at it and say that it isn’t. So, what does this all mean? I’m guessing that the movie would probably take on more of a thriller vibe. Maybe similar to Silence of the Lambs or a M. Night Shamalamadingdong movie. I could be completely wrong, but that is what I took away from the interview.

Kevin also touched on the project he is planning for after Red State. According to the interview, it is a comedy set in Minnesota during the winter. On his blog, Kevin mentions that Mosier and him are planning something special for their 10th movie (that would be this comedy). We can rule out the View Askewniverse, though. Kevin says that he has just begun to write the script. I guess we will just have to wait and see how it all pans out.

Things to think about

So, how about them Mavs? Getting the Dwayne Wade treatment against the Warriors in game 2. Sure, the Warriors did play pretty poorly, but they could have overcome that if they weren’t getting called for every little ticky-tack foul (not to mention the crazy Ts. You know, where Stephen Jackson gets T-ed up because he is 10 feet away from the quarrel). Anyway, the warriors still have home court advantage for the series, and they are one of the best home teams (and one of the worst road teams). So, we’ll see how this all plays out from here.

On to something everyone can enjoy.

Yesterday, I stumbled across the Hard Rock Park being built in Myrtle Beach, SC. I had heard of the project some time back, but didn’t really get any details until yesterday. I thought the information was interesting enough for all you to know about it too.

Hard Rock Park is a Theme Park being built in Myrtle Beach, SC. The different areas are going to have different rock and roll themes (hence the “theme” park title). The themed areas are going to be Rock & Roll Heaven, British Invasion, Lost in the 70’s, Born in the USA, and Cool Country (I guess country is now considered rock and roll). There is an water area being called Reggae River Falls.

One of the big images for the park is going to be “Mount RockMore.” Which will be the equivalent of the Magic Kingdom Castle, Animal Kingdom Tree of Life, MGM Hat, etc. except waaayyy smaller.

This is a picture of what Mount RockMore looks like. It actually looks horrible. Can you name all the rockers on it?

Okay, the second one from the left is obviously John Lennon. That one is decent. Next to Lennon is Marley. Once again, that looks all right (mostly because of the dreads). All the way to the left is Elvis. Which you may or may not have gotten from the sideburns. But who’s that dude at the right end? Honestly, can you tell who he is?

It’s Jimi Hendrix - or at least that’s who it’s supposed to be.

So, this park is looking a little crappy so far. Let’s see if we can change that up.

Let’s check out a few of the eateries they are going to have.

The eateries take on different rock eras.

First, we have the 1950’s rock.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Next, we have the surf rock era.

 

Next, we have the Love Shack era (i.e. the stab yourself in the ear eatery).

The next one is the British Pub. This one is kind of cool looking.

And last of all, the coolest designed eatery. The Punk Rock Era.

Okay, the eateries are kind of hit or miss, but I’m willing to give them the benefit of the doubt. At least they are putting design thought into the areas which is a lot better than many theme parks.

Now the question is, are there going to be any rides at this place? We demand entertainment!

This is where the park starts getting a bit odd. I’m kind of digging it, but it is questionable at best as a family destination. I’ll start you off with the biggest head scratcher.

Yes! A theme park area called “Magic Mushroom Garden.” Bring the kids!

In all seriousness though, the fact that this is so weird makes me kind of want to check it out.

Let’s get into the more exciting rides.

First up, we have “Slippery When Wet” (another kid friendly title).

From what I have read, this is a roller coaster type ride where you can shoot water at passerbys… and the passerbys can shoot water at the riders (that last part is kind of like Islands of Adventure’s Ripsaw Falls). Sounds kind of cool and worth checking out.

Now for the premiere attraction at Hard Rock Park.

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LED ZEPPLIN – THE RIDE

This is a roller coaster designed by B&M (the dudes behind Batman: The Ride, The Riddler’s Revenge, and many more).

This ride is supposedly set to the Led Zepplin’s “Whole Lotta Love” song (No, honestly, we are a family friendly park.)

My guess is that this ride takes over “Rock ‘n Roller Coaster” as the best ride based on a band (Led Zepplin is a bit better than Aerosmith - subjectively speaking) (Chris Columbus’ Sailing: The Ride coming in at a distant third). I especially enjoy the blimp as seen in the pictures.

The park is also going to have a large ampitheater where live performances will be held.

This is just the tip of the iceberg for the park. You can check out a lot more information about it here, here, or on the official website, here.

Congrats!

I have a ton of stuff to talk about today. So, for you three people who still check this thing, congratulations, you’ve hit the mother-load… so to speak.

I’m putting each new topics’ opening paragraph in bold as to make the subject divisions easier on you.

Let’s start off with me making an semi-outrageous claim. I’ve made my pick for best movie of 2007. Note that I don’t mean the best movie of 2007 so far, I’m including all the movies that have yet to be released.

Yes, this past Friday, we made the long trip out to Tampa and caught a showing of Hot Fuzz. If you don’t know about this movie yet, you are an idiot. Wait, was that too harsh? I’m sorry. I mean, Hot Fuzz is the follow up film to Shaun of the Dead (a surprise break out hit a couple of years ago). Instead of homaging/satiring the horror genre again (although it does have some horror moments), Hot Fuzz takes on the action/comedy universe.

I really like Shaun of the Dead, but it never really had a deep connection because of my tastes in movie genres. Hot Fuzz completely connects with my tastes and really knocks the ball out of the park. Right from the beginning of the movie I was laughing out loud. The movie also hits all the bad ass notes necessary for a great action movie. Also, the true test of any movie, it has a high quotability factor.

Touching on the last part, Patti said it best with, “every 10 minutes there was another thing I wanted to remember so I could quote later.” Okay, that may not have been her exact quote, but I think you get the gist of it. There are so manyquotable parts that you will have trouble remembering them all (“Naarp?” “What’s the matter? You’ve never taken a short cut?” “You should have told him to cool off.”).

I only have two issues with the movie. First and foremost, the film isn’t as widely released as it should be (i.e. we had to drive 40 minutes to Tampa to see it. Chris had to drive 1 hour and a half to Chicago to see it). My other complaint would be that the movie was a little on the long side. Sure, I was entertained during the whole time, but my butt was starting to sting from the sitting (maybe that has more to do with the theater seats).

In case you are wondering on how I can complain about the length of a movie and yet claim it to be the best of the year, just check out last year. The number one movie from last year was Casino Royale. Which, if you don’t recall, was a bit long, but still entertaining. So, that downside is not really a substantial one.

Hot Fuzz is a movie you should go out and see. Even if you need to drive 2 hours to see it. Also, it is a DVD purchase once it comes out. It gets the highest rating possible on whatever movie critiquing scale you want to use.

By the way, BBC America is playing Spaced again (We had the first two episodes on the DVR when I woke up this morning). So, set you DVRs accordingly. And if you don’t know what Spaced is, then you really don’t know much about Simon Pegg/Nick Frost/Edgar Wright, do you? But it was their British TV series before they made Shaun of the Dead/Hot Fuzz. It’s got a similar comdey style and if you like the movies, you should check out the series reruns (by the way, how long are we going to have to wait to get Spaced on DVD in America?).

The next topic to talk about is the Mavs and Warriors.

As you may recall, this past summer I decided to choose a NBA team to start rooting for. My choice, the G.S. Warriors.

Yesterday (Sunday, 4/22) Game 1 of the series was played between the Mavs and Warriors. The end result was the Warriors pulling out a win with a superb performance by Boom Dizzle (33 points, 14 boards [!], and 8 dimes).

But, I’m not going to talk to much about yesterday’s game. Instead I want to look forward to the upcoming game(s).

Right now, a lot of people are ripping Avery Johnson for changing his team to better match up with the Warriors. These critics are saying that the Mavs should have stuck with what made them get the best record in the regular season.

My guess is that A.J. is going to heed this idea to a certain degree and start game 2 with a larger line-up.

So, what should the Warriors do in this case?

It’s obvious that they can’t man up with a larger team, but going with a smaller line-up will result in the loss of many rebounds.

If I was coach, I would start with a smaller line-up. We would then do a lot of cuts/high tempo moves and try to draw some quick fouls on the big guys. Also, I would work Biedrins (the only real center [that's any good] on the warriors) into the line-up a little bit more often. All the while keeping up the high speed pace (it’s our bread and butter).

Would I start Biedrins if the Mavs start Dampier/Diop? No. That would take us out of our game and play into the Mavs’ hands (which, if you ask the mavs, doesn’t work out all that well).

Our third topic today is the Disney World attractions (i.e. we spent the day there yesterday).

We went to Animal Kingdom in the A.M. yesterday, not realizing that it was Earth Day and the 8th anniversary of it’s opening (which means that it was jam packed with people). We got our Everest fast passes (by the way, every theme park should have a fast pass option – you know, one that’s free like Disney’s) and then the kids went on the River Rapids ride. I didn’t feel like getting drenched so I waited at a at the exit. While waiting, we saw a couple of full grown ducks walking right next to us. Then a few minutes later, a little duckling was right there with us. And by right there with us, I mean that the little guy brushed up against my shoes.

We then went and had lunch. By the way, Animal Kingdom has the absolutely worst selection of eateries at any Disney Park. There isn’t a single restaurant that is consistently good (note: a few years ago, the Pizzafari was a bankable Animal Kingdom eatery, but Disney discontinued their Caesar Salad Sandwich. Now it is just another horrible eatery). Anyway, I had a fried chicken sandwich with steak fries at the Tusker House in Africa. The food tasted decent and I like carbs, but a huge bun, fried chicken, and steak fries? That’s just too much.

After that we looked at some caged animals. Same thing you can get at a zoo. Doesn’t really warrant discussion.

Then we took “the sideways train” out to a pet zoo. I actually kind of liked the petting zoo. I’m not sure what it was, but I normally hate petting zoos. I think the smell wasn’t as strong as they usually are. Also, the animals didn’t look pissed off (as they usually do at petting zoos). So, that was actually kind of cool.

Finally, our Everest passes are good and we hop into line. Kyle decides he wants to ride with me, and it just so happens that we get the front row (I’d never ridden front row on it before). The ride is great regardless of where you sit, but it’s apparent the the ride was disigned for the riders in the front row. I could go into the details, but I’ll just let you all find out for yourselves.

After Everest, we ditched the kids and went over to Epcot (the reason we were at Disney in the first place). I had read that the Mexican ride (El Rio Del Tiempo) had been refurbished and now featured the Three Caballeros (Donald Duck, Jose Carioca, and Panchito). So, we were there to check it out.

We started off going to Free Cokes from around the world (they keep changing the name of the area, so we just call it the free coke area). 99% of the people that go in hate the italian soda (Beverly), but I came to the conclusion that it is good as long as you can get past the initial bitter flavor (most people can’t).

After that, we went to the new Finding Nemo ride. It’s basically the Haunted Mansion set to Nemo. It was kind of dull and the ride didn’t have enough A/C pumping so it was a bit warm for me.

After that we did a little shopping at the nations. Then we got onto the aforementioned Mexican Ride. I have no idea why, but I’ve always enjoyed the Mexico ride. Now that it has Donald et al, it is just that much better. It’s not necessarily a must see ride, but it does add a little bit extra to the park.

The last stop was to Japan to grab some food. We got a little cooked meal, a sushi roll, an iced green tea, and a piece of ginger cake. Most of the meal was okay, but not great. Then we got to the ginger cake. Now, I’m not a person who really likes ginger, so I was a little skeptical going in. But after the first bite, I knew that this was one of the greatest cakes I’ve tasted.

What makes this cake so good while so many others fail? The icing. Usually when you get a piece of cake there is about an inch of frosting on the top and it has a grainy texture to it. With the ginger cake, the icing was really smooth and creamy. It was like taking a bite of cake and a sip of milk with it. It was crazy delicious.

One last note, today we are getting little Evelyn Van Meowerschmidt fixed.

In case you don’t know, that is Evie’s long name. She should actually be done with the surgery by now. We’ll see how she is when we get home.

Allright, I think we’ve covered all the bases today. Let me know what you think.

Does this mean what I think it means?

I just found out today that ABC’s blockbuster TV show, “Lost,” now features Brian K. Vaughan.

For the uninitiated, BKV is a comic book writer. Not that I’m a huge comic buff or have any qualifications along those lines. I have read BKV’s Y: The Last Man and love it. I highly suggest checking it out if you have yet to have the chance (Thanks to Chris for bringing this series to my attention).

So, now one of my favorite comic book writers is writing for a TV show that I tried to watch, but it was just too damned slow. Does this mean that I should start watching Lost? Right now, I’m leaning towards no, but I could be persuaded.

So, it’s on you now ABC. Persuade me to watch your show.

Sketch Comedy Ideas

Let me start off by apologizing for my long leave of absence between new posts. The last week of March I was out on vacation and spent little time on the computer. Since coming back from vacation, I have been busy with my job (working in the financial industry the two weeks leading up to Tax Day [April 17th this year, if you are insane enough to not have taken care of this yet]). So, the amount of time I’ve had to write new posts has been limited. Sorry.

If you recall, I watched a recent episode of SNL (featuring Rainn Wilson from The Office). In this post, I explained that the show is pretty much unwatchable. It would be completely unwatchable if you were to actually watch it live (i.e. not taped on a DVR where you can fast forward the commercials).

So, with this in mind, I decided to see if I could come up with a sketch (or a few sketches) that would be better than anything on a typical current run SNL (this is actually a game you can play at home if you want).

Here’s a few of the sketches I thought up:

A) The Numbers- In this sketch, a few patrons of a local bar discuss the popular restroom euphemisms, number one and number two. The conversation leads to a creation of a numbering system that goes up to number 63.

B) Coach – In this sketch, we head into the dugout of a professional baseball team. Everything is as you would expect in a normal dugout…except the manager treats the team as if they were little leaguers.

C) Travel Agency- A man walks into a travel agency to book a trip to Spain. The travel agent informs the man that it is a time travel agency and he can go to anytime in history. The conversation goes back and forth with the time travel agent pitching different eras to the man and the man wanting to go to the modern day Spain.

I’ve knocked out the basic script for “Numbers” and I have a general outline for the other two.

So, what do you think about these sketch ideas? Potentially funny? SNL bad? Let me know what you think.

Also, I want to open the discussion up to allow for your sketch ideas.

Maybe if we get the time someday, we will actually put them on film and slap them on the internet or something.

NBC Comedy Done Right

In case you didn’t know, NBC’s comedy night done right is back tonight with new episodes.

Starting at 8 PM (all times Eastern) we have a new episode of The Office. According to TV Guide, this is a longer episode than normal; with the run time coming in at about 40 minutes.

After Office, NBC has another longer-than-normal episode. This time it is a 40 minute long new episode of 30 Rock.

After 30 Rock, we get a new episode of Scrubs (just normal sized).

After Scrubs, we get an episode of the hot new comedy, Andy Barker, P.I.

This is followed by a rerun of Earl.

My impressions of this strategy is overall really good. You can’t complain about the longer episodes of Office and 30 Rock (the cornerstones of the NBC comedy night). Scrubs and ABPI, while not the most popular, are right up there with any other show on tv. The rerun of Earl is a bit of a let down, but this season has been a little bit of a bust for the show anyway (the show’s formula seems to be getting tired and the crazy characters that made the first season so fresh/original are now old news, leaving us with a kind of bland show [sorry for the run-on]). So, we can almost look at tonight like Andy Barker is replacing Earl (when compared to the fall season TV schedule), and with the rise of A.B.P.I. and the fall of Earl, I have to say that is a positive gain. Andy Barker episodes I have gone back and rewatched and they usually hold up pretty well. It’s not the same with the old Earl episodes, they seem to lose their freshness pretty quickly.

We’ll see how well it plays out tonight.

ESPN programming

As you probably know, the MLB season just started this past Sunday. As a baseball fan, I enjoy watching games on TV. This leads us up to last night.

Last night there were several MLB games scheduled, a few NBA games scheduled, and the Women’s NCAA basketball tournament finals.

Knowing this, when I got home from work I checked out the upcoming TV schedule to see what was coming on (and hoping the A’s would somehow have been on). My local cable company has ESPN and ESPN2 on sequential channels (27 and 28). As I was flipping the channels, I saw that the Women’s tourney was on BOTH espn and espn 2. So, thinking that this is just a misprint on the guide, I wait for the game and then double check. They are in fact airing the same thing on the two different channels. This thing shouldn’t even be televised, and it is on two ESPN channels.

Who was the marketing genius that came up with this strategy? “Okay, we have a tournement final that no one wants to see. Let’s tie up both of our channels showing it. Oh, and can we get last year’s tourney on the Classic channel? No? Damn.”

Seriously, you have a slew of MLB games and a few NBA games and you are playing the Tourney on both channels? You could have at least thrown on a World’s Strongest Man competion marathon on ESPN 2.

Anyway, due to ESPN’s double billing of the same program, I had more sport viewing options reduced to three. The options were:

1) Watch the Women’s Tourney (Not going to happen. Ever.)

2) Watch the local MLB telecast (and by local, I mean a Florida team. In this case it was the Florida Marlins… and they were playing the Washington Nationals).

3) Watch a local High School baseball game (some how this made TV. Don’t ask me how).

No NBA in sight. One crappy MLB game. And because MLB’s infinite wisdom, I don’t have access to MLB Extra Innings first week free preview.

So, as you may have guessed, I ended up watching part of the H.S. baseball game and then retired to the Study to view some episodes of Red Dwarf.

NBA player nicknames – In China

NBA.com had a little column on what some of the NBA players nicknames are in China (you can check out the column here).

The highlight of the list is Tim Duncan – Stone Buddha. I say we start a movement to have his nickname changed stateside from “The Big Fundamental” (boring) to the Stone Buddha. It better conveys his demeanor and strength.

Most of the other nicknames were pretty bland (i.e. LeBron as “Little Emperor”).

A couple more that I liked were Kevin Garnett – “King of the Wolves” and Carmelo Anthony – “Sweet Melon.”

Regardless, all the nicknames are better than the new American standard nickname, the first initial of the first name and then the first few of the last (ala J. Lo, A-Rod, etc.). It is the most unoriginal and boring excuse for a nickname. It’s on par with calling Michael Jordan “Mike” and then claiming it is his nickname. Come on America, show some creativity.

Otm Shank movies!

“Who’s Otm Shank?

He is India’s answer to Brian Dennehey.”

I was at Best Buy last night and while looking through the movie section I saw a badass deal.

Three Tom Hanks (not Otm Shank) movies for $10.

I know what you are thinking, “3 movies for $10? It must stick the consumer with such crap as The Bachelor Party or something.”

That seems like a logical enough thought. Lord knows Best Buy has a long standing tradition of sticking crappy movies in with a movie you already own and a movie you’d actually want (A tradition Tom Hanks three pack would include The Bachelor party, Cast Away, and Big. Bachelor Party is pretty much unwatchable, Cast Away is decent but not purchase worthy, and who doesn’t already own Big?).

Well, much to my surprise, the three pack of movies for $10 were three solid to great level movies and I didn’t own a single one of them. Here’s the 3 pack I bought:

1) The Money Pit – An underrated Tom Hanks comedy. I caught some of it on TV a couple of months ago and was laughing out loud through most of what I saw.

2) The ‘Burbs - In my opinion the weakest of the three movies. I know some people really love this movie, I think it’s all right and will probably watch it a couple of times.

3) Dragnet – One of the finest Tom Hanks comedies out there. When this movie originally came out, it lead to me watching the old Dragnet series on TV. Which, by the way, was a huge mistake. There is no comedy at all and poor production quality. I was pretty upset about that.

They could have packaged just The Money Pit and Dragnet for $10 and I would have at least considered buying it. But throw in The ’Burbs and keep the price; well that is a deal too good to pass up.

This sale is on for this week. So, if you don’t own any of the movies, you might want to stop by Best Buy. The copy I picked up was the last one on the shelf.